Your Own Personal Mount Everest

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I have a question for you. Are you ready? OK, here it is: What is your Own Personal Mount Everest? I have another question: What did you answer? Never mind; it doesn’t matter. Whatever it is, these socks will help you to climb it. Yes, you can conquer your equivalent of the world’s highest, most important, most valuable mountain in some other socks… but why would you? Our socks are authentic and wick away sweat while keeping you warm, but won’t cause blisters, wear out, or discolor the skin of your feet. They will not cause dysentery, like other sock brands, or lead you to question your self-worth.

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How many times have you found yourself at your desk eating lunch over your keyboard and silently weeping? This is because life as you’ve lived it up until now has been a hollow farce. Quit your job! Set off into the unknown! Follow your heart; like a dowsing rod calibrated for pure adventure, it will lead you to a place where all of your questions will be answered and the mundane crust of life will fall like scales from your eyes. To make this transformative journey, you’ll want MaxoRay® brand sunglasses, which not only block 99% of harmful UV radiation, but also allow you to view formerly invisible wavelengths, penetrating the superficial layers of reality and revealing the gem-like core of existence. They also come with a microfiber pouch that doubles as a cleaning cloth.

Lao Tzu said, “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step,” but if you’re going that far, you’re going to need the best footwear. Luckily, these shoes were designed by NASA scientists working with our elite athlete team specifically to carry you on a vision quest to meet the you you always fantasized you could be. While wearing these shoes, you will be rendered physically incapable of binge watching Netflix original programming. They will compel you to move! They have soles rated to carry you at least as far as happiness but possibly all the way to Nirvana.

But these pants aren’t just technological wonders fit for the most extreme conditions you might encounter in Nepal, on the PCT, or deep in the cactus-needled expanses of the Mojave—they’re also perfect for a night at the bar, tossing back craft beers with other lean, sun-kissed travelers with knowing eyes and possibly beards. With a patented, four-way stretch, non-toxic, fair trade fabric and riveted pockets that pay homage to our unique brand’s storied heritage, these are more than just pants, they’re an indispensable garment with a timeless look and money-back guarantee.

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Photo Friday: 11 Shots from Oz

Years ago, I took a trip to Australia for my friend’s wedding. I took a month for the trip, so I’d have time to go climbing and exploring the countryside. I rented a Subaru in Sydney, learned to drive stick and drive on the wrong side of the road, and went on a mini-walkabout. It ended up being one of the greatest trips of my life. (Up there with the trip where I proposed to my fiancée in Paris, a trip to Greece with my parents when I was in my teens, and the RocTrip China trip.) I could easily write a five-thousand word travelogue about my time in Oz, but I have neither the time nor the inclination. Instead, I’ll share a few selected photos of the thousands I took. Happy Photo Friday!

A view of Sydney Harbor
So first I flew to Australia and got a hotel in Sydney. I was sure to find one with a nice view of Sydney Harbor and its famous bridge, which offers tours up on top of the arched supports.
Roos on the horizon
Then I drove out to the countryside for my mate's (that's Aussie slang for friend -- "G'doy, moite!") wedding which was at a nice country club. On the way, I passed a lot of roos. That's Aussie shortspeak for Kangaroos. Roo bangers are not people with a kangaroo fetish, but sausages made out of kangaroo meat. (Think: bangers and mash, the British dish... Australians are descended from British stock, you know!)
Wallaby and wallababy
Here's a shot of a roo and its joey (joey means offspring -- love it!). These were plucking around country club. They're as common as deer on the East Coast of the US, but much cooler to watch. I mean seriously, they jump to get around. Crazy!
Taipan wall in the Grampians
This is the Taipan wall, a climbing area in the Grampians, which is a National Park. (If you look closely, you'll find a climber in a red shirt hanging on rope somewhere on the wall.) Taipan may be the single raddest sport climbing crag in the world. The routes are long (150 feet or more), runout (in Aussie fashion), and ascend gorgeous lines on perfect sandstone pockets, edges, and slopers. I traded belays with some locals and a nice Austrian couple who were on an around-the-world climbing trip. Lucky there were there, as I was all flying solo on this trip.
Taipan under moonlight
Taipan under moonlight.
Herpin' at Hollow Mountain
Herpin' at Hollow Mountain. Here, Klaus, one of the Austrians mentioned above, holds one of the Grampians-area lizards, of which there were many. We found this one just around the Hollow Mountain Cave area (see below). No reptiles were harmed in the making of this photo.
Klaus goin' for it in the Hollow Mountain Cave
Here we find Klaus goin' for it in the Hollow Mountain Cave. This V8 sat at the very lip of the 40-foot deep cave and guards the end of the famous Wheel of Life, which is boulder problem / route that was originally graded V16 by Japanese climber Dai Koyomada. I think Klaus sent this rig. I can't remember.
Chris Webb Parsons gunning for Wheel of Life
Here's a shot of one of the locals I climbed with. His name Chris Webb Parsons. While I was in the Grampians, he was very close to sending Wheel of Life (pictured here). When I had to head back to Sydney, he handed me the keys to his house in Sydney and told me I could crash a few days until my flight left. He was going to stay and work on Wheel, he explained. I did, and he did, and then he sent the Wheel, which was, I think, its second ascent. Helluva nice guy and really very strong, too.
Flower field
After a week in a tent at the Grampians, I started to get a little funky. On the way to find some showers in town, I drove past this nice little scene. Australia is full of vistas like this. Because the population density is so low, it's not uncommon to get a view without any man-made structures. Oh wait, there's a barn there in the distance. Never mind.
The climber's life
Another one of the nice locals who made me feel at home. This fellow had a nicely appointed climber's road-trip van and a plucky pup to go along with it.
Syndey Aquarium
Before heading back to the States, I decided to take advantage of my time in Sydney and hit the aquarium there. I haven't been to many aquariums, but this one seemed excellent. Here, the sharks get to watch the people watching them, thanks to a handy glassed-in walkway.